About Laurel’s Crown

For years I saw myself as a loser because I was a Christian who struggled with mental illness and a sexual addiction. My “adventure” seemed out of my control and God didn’t seem to be helping very much. In 2004 I started blogging as free therapy. I was a mess and I needed an outlet. My blog was a messy little blog with lots of ramblings, mood swings, and more rambling. Somewhere in all of that rambling, people actually started reading it and telling me that I should write a book.

I was a school teacher for 11 years until I realized that teaching children was not my passion.  I got my degree in Rhetoric from UC Berkeley. Writing is my passion. Public Speaking is my passion. I quit teaching in June 2009 to pursue the next chapter in the adventure. Before that I was the Communications Officer on a medical missionary ship. I’ve worked for Child Protective Services Investigations Division, the battered women’s shelter, and the Maui Humane Society. I’ve always been drawn to helping people (and pets) in need but writing is what I really wanted to do. Writing, however, has not yet morphed into a full time career, so I returned to the classroom when bills started piling up. I’m helping young adults learn job skills and enter the workforce, which is both challenging and fulfilling. I still dream and pray about becoming a published author because I hope other Christians who struggle with mental illness or life in general can be encouraged by my story. Mine isn’t a dramatic story. I don’t cut off any body parts or lose a limb to a shark. My adventure is about walking day in and day out with Jesus when life happens.

In 2010 I had a hysterectomy and God literally changed my life — I have not struggled with depression or suicidal ideation since the removal of my girlie parts. I’ve written a memoir based on my blogs that is going under a major re-edit right now. In the meantime, Maui continues to provide the backdrop for the adventure and I hope to live here until I am old and very gray.

laurel crown = winner

  1. February 19, 2010 at 12:14 am

    Wow. Quite a testimony. He is faithful!

  2. February 19, 2010 at 7:58 am

    Yes, he IS faithful even when my mental illness tried to convince me that he wasn’t.

  3. May 20, 2010 at 2:05 pm

    hi ya, so glad i have found you and this blog, shall book mark it x

  4. May 20, 2010 at 6:47 pm

    Hey fragmentz,

    Thanks for visiting my blog. I stopped by yours and it looks really interesting. I’m sure to become a frequent visitor of your blog.

  5. September 20, 2010 at 6:33 pm

    Hi, nice to meet you !

  6. September 21, 2010 at 5:02 pm

    Hi ReadersHeaven! Welcome to Bipolar World. Nice to meet you too.

  7. January 17, 2011 at 8:22 am

    All I hear is a bunch of whining about something that you could fix if you werent too busy looking for attention.

  8. January 17, 2011 at 9:31 am

    In the past, comments like yours would have crushed me and forced me into hiding. Now I realize that I don’t have anything to hide. I didn’t do anything wrong. Mean spirited people like you are the ones who should hide.

    Mental illness is real and people suffer who suffer from it don’t always know what to do to “get over it” because there is no quick “fix.” And if you think that honest sharing of struggle and emotion is a “bunch of whining” then I pray to God that neither you nor anyone you love ever have to deal with any kind of mental illness because you won’t be of any help to them. Good day. Please do not visit my blog if it offends you.

  9. March 25, 2011 at 4:08 pm

    Hello, very lovely site.

  10. March 25, 2011 at 6:19 pm

    Hello Onagh,

    Welcome to Bipolar World! Thanks for leaving a comment and letting me know you stopped by.

  11. July 26, 2011 at 11:40 am

    Amen! Laurel

  12. Tita
    October 29, 2011 at 9:47 pm

    Only by the hand of god could I have found this blog at this time during one of the most turbulent times in my life..I’m speechless at his beauty n mercy n for his guidance… that I have been seeking for to be lead here of all places the Internet.

  13. October 30, 2011 at 12:33 am

    Hello TIta! Welcome to Bipolar World. I don’t know what is going on in your life, but I do know that you are not alone in the adventure. God will be with you every step of the way even when it doesn’t seem like it. I pray that he would give you clear guidance as he leads you through this turbulent time.

  14. January 5, 2012 at 8:17 pm

    I have struggled with Bipolar since I was 17, and writing is what has got me to a level place. It is a powerful tool, and now im studying Professional Writing full time. Its a fantastic outlet. Ill be reading your blog :)

  15. January 5, 2012 at 8:51 pm

    Hello Clairefsteele! Welcome to Bipolar World! Yes, writing is a power tool of self-discovery and blogging is the best free therapy on the market! :) I’ll check to see if you have a blog and if you do… I’ll stop by.

  16. koolgooseygramma
    February 5, 2012 at 3:04 pm

    …And to think I thought your name was Bipolar Girl. I had problems …Laurelscrown! I do like Laurels Crown much better!

  17. February 5, 2012 at 3:38 pm

    Hey KGG!

    BPG just kinda stays with me since that’s who I thought I was when I started blogging. “Laurel Crowned” was already taken as a username but I had to have a variant of it because it’s so significant to me since my real name is Lori. The race might be on a rocky road… but I aim to get my crown!!!

  18. koolgooseygramma
    February 5, 2012 at 3:50 pm

    We already have ours waiting for us!

  19. February 5, 2012 at 5:16 pm

    :)

  20. February 20, 2012 at 5:23 pm

    Hi…I came to your blog through another blogger. It is so interesting to find other people who have struggled in their lives with mental illness.

    Mine took on the name of ‘depression’ which lived with me throughout most of my life on and off.

    It is good that people like yourself are writing about it so it isn’t so mysterious and almost frightening to some. If you haven’t had anyone you know with mental illness, of course you are going to have no tolerance. There are many like one person who posted and thinks you were only looking for attention and could ‘fix it’ if only you tried.

    Keep on….keeping on and good luck and many blessings as you seek to write a book.

  21. February 20, 2012 at 6:22 pm

    WriterWB! Welcome to Bipolar World! Seems like you and I share more than the past history of mental illness… can’t wait to go visit your blog when I have more time to know about your journey. :) Thank you so much for the encouraging words. After years of living with my own self-condemnation, it’s a balm to my soul to receive encouragement from somebody other than my close personal friends… it’s kinda in the contract that they HAVE to say nice things to me. ;) I will keep on keeping on and I will take all the luck and blessings possible to help me get my book published.

  22. gwendolin
    April 25, 2012 at 1:49 am

    “In 2010 I had a hysterectomy and God literally changed my life — I have not struggled with depression or suicidal ideation since the removal of my girlie parts.”

    This is my first visit to your website and it was in reference to “ask the holy spirit” which brought me to the first time you shared ‘”the pony” technique.

    I have to ask about your sentence from your ‘about’ section. Do you feel the depression/suicidal ideation is connected to your “girlie parts” or rather that you experienced God in the wake of the hysterectomy. I am keen to learn as I am fed up with struggling with depression.
    thank you.
    anonamouse.p

  23. April 25, 2012 at 6:16 am

    Hello Gwendolin! Welcome to Bipolar World. I believed God used the hysterectomy but I have no idea how. Before I’d had my surgery I’d heard stories both ways — some women had the surgery and never experienced depression again while others had the surgery and had depression worse than they’d ever had it before. There is no conclusive medical evidence to prove that hysterectomy is a cure for depression and I wouldn’t advise anybody to go through that seeking a cure for depression. It could have gone the other way for me (my biggest fear at the time), but it did not. For that, I praise God… but even if it had gone the way of the worst case scenario, God would STILL have been God and I would have had to look harder for “the pony.”

    I think whatever God leads us to try when struggling with depression we need to be open and obedient to it. We also need to understand that there are some things medicine cannot fix and in those cases we need to firmly fix our eyes on God and persevere. Not sure if this was the answer you were seeking… but I pray that God uses it as he guides you in your struggle with depression. I would only ever suggest a hysterectomy if it was medically necessary as I’ve had a whole slew of health problems as a result of it that required two more surgeries. I’m still having health problems because of it… but the dark depression IS gone so in my mind it was worth it.

  24. May 18, 2012 at 1:32 pm

    Hi, I know you’ve been blogging a long time and maybe already have this but I have nominated you for the Versatile Bloggers Award…Diane…details at http://hometogo232.wordpress.com/posts/

  25. May 18, 2012 at 5:54 pm

    Thanks Dyan. :)

  26. June 1, 2012 at 9:16 am

    Lori, I have nominated you for the Reader Appreciation Award because I value your blog and comments so much…Diane …details are at http://hometogo232.wordpress.com/2012/06/01/for-a-second-time/

  27. king62198
    June 2, 2012 at 6:20 am

    I really love this. I will look forward every day to reading your blog. And to think of all the problems other had…wow…

  28. June 3, 2012 at 8:31 am

    Hello king62198. Welcome to Bipolar World. Thank you for stopping by and leaving a comment. I don’t actually update on a daily basis. Generally I only blog when I feel like I have something to say…. and then there are days where I can’t quite seem to shut up. :) As for all the problems I have?? We ALL have problems. The key is to focus on what God is doing in the midst of our problems.

  29. king62198
    June 3, 2012 at 8:39 am

    Oh and Yes! And then we should take God’s journey, because he put us here for a reason and we shall fulfill that reason, no matter what struggles we go through. your reason was to entertain with your beautiful writings.

  30. June 3, 2012 at 8:45 am

    Exactly and thank you!

  31. July 12, 2012 at 2:52 pm

    Hope all is well…maybe just busy or enjoying summer??….what am I saying it’s mostly almost always summer there isn’t it?…Anyway you were just on my mind…thought I’d say Hi..Diane

  32. May 17, 2013 at 7:11 am

    Just thinking of you and hoping you’re just taking a break for awhile but that you’re okay…Diane

  33. May 17, 2013 at 5:41 pm

    Diane, thank you for being concerned. I’m ok. I just haven’t had much to say.

  34. November 6, 2013 at 8:39 pm

    I always squeak in the back way….lol… Just read your last post and while you posted a bit about various issues… there lies within several posts I think … More behind each… But then perhaps you didn’t want to delve more into them… and of course that’s your decision… I was just referring to the fact you were wondering why you hadn’t been blogging much.. It’s too bad that you feel you can’t open up comments because of the ‘stalkers’ for lack of a better word…. Maybe more feedback would encourage you… Again… that is your decision and not mine to suggest… Just know that I always want to hear what’s going on in your life Lori…. I get bits and piece on facebook though and that’s nice… take care Diane xoxo

  35. November 6, 2013 at 8:46 pm

    Diane, as soon as I saw the highlighted comment bubble I shrieked, “How are they doing this????” Then I thought, “Of course, it COULD be Diane” and then I laughed when I saw that it was you. One of these days I’m going to figure out how you posts comments when I have them blocked. No immediate plans to unblock them but feel free to squeak through whatever backdoor you use whenever you feel moved to comment.

  36. November 6, 2013 at 8:57 pm

    Where there’s a will there’s a way…. which means I just look and see… well ‘maybe”…….. Anyway friend I’m glad nobody else does it… The situation with your sister I can so relate to … it seems that you feel it is a ‘forever thing’… Right now I have had to at least for now …hopefully not forever… accept the fact our daughter does not want to be part of our lives… It is such a complex and yet sad because she just won’t allow discussion on the issues… She prefers to just close the door…..anyway take care .. I do hope some of the issues that face you especailly related to work… resolve or at least cause you less stress… Love Diane xoxo

  1. May 18, 2012 at 12:58 pm
  2. June 1, 2012 at 9:08 am

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